Skip to main content

Running With Ahmaud Arbery


The video was just another notch to the mental file that is overflowing with images, scenery, and experiences for people of color in this country.

And despite the common thread and the consistent reminder of a country rooted in its racism, one which currently is MAGA-ing its way into another evolution of the same or similar ideals, it still hurts. It still troubles. It still bothers.

Young black men, young people of color, continue to carry the greatest threat to Americana - their skin.

While the world continues to serve us a helping of COVID and the ramifications, the worries, and the sleepless nights of concern that come with it - this file, this constant ever existence of wearing darker skin or even fitting the image of what others consume as fear, continues.

In a world that is completely shut down. Where even awful tragedies of the kinds such as mass shootings have ceased - this awful, cruel, vile thing called racism, that festers at the roots of Americanism, still breaks through. Whether it be the killing of another young black boy. Or, disproportionately enforcing basic measures in black and brown communities - it just doesn't stop.

---


I honestly don't know how to feel beyond the usual rage about the murder of Ahmaud Arbery beyond the usual disappointment and fear that comes with these stories. I've experienced it - and if you reading this are a person of color too - you very much have as well.

It further saddens me that a mother would have NEVER gotten justice if the video would have never leaked, and the national public would have never forced the hand of those who have sworn to uphold the law in the state of Georgia.

Yet, what really lights my fire and stirs my anger was the latest report that law enforcement told the family of Ahmaud Arbery that he was killed while committing an attempted robbery. It further lessens my belief in law enforcement. And yes, miss me with all of that #bluelivesmatter nonsense. Not after this. Not after the images of protests around the nation included many white faces intentionally and aggressively behaving on the front steps of government buildings with loaded weapons.

Again...that triggered me. And as of this writing, it still does. Maybe, because now that I am a parent, it stings a bit harder, guts a bit deeper, and that intuition of knowing your child is there - both their rights and wrongs. Maybe it is indeed the double standard. Maybe it is the overflowing of trauma that every person of color carries. Maybe because I do run with Amoud - many of us do, every day.

And yes, I plan to run 2.23 miles this weekend, in honor of Ahmaud. I'll run with him in that way as well.

But before I head out to clear my headspace, and to also fill it back with clearer thoughts on where this race called life currently is, I do want to shout out all of the white people who are indeed allies.

Allyship is often forgotten, and as the great Dr. King would always reference, it is the reeducation of the white individual that leads us to where we need to be. There aren't enough yet, and that is apparent by the current system, and in various ways, within our governmental leadership. But there are many who do - and through this, many who have. and it should be appreciated.

Maybe because Ahmaud was partaking in something that is relative for white individuals - running culture, and the basic right of doing so in your own neighborhood. Maybe, COVID has caused some of us to look at the core things in life? Just maybe, they too, have had enough of this. I don't know.

Regardless, the situation has very much exposed the privilege of whiteness in an extremely clear way to a large majority of white individuals - even for the doubters. And that is a step in the right direction.

And if you haven't spoken up, just note, silence is indeed a decision.
He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.
-Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Nonetheless, I started this post, not with a vision, a clear message, or even a point to convey, but with the opportunity to get feelings out. I don't care who you are, there is no fine or pin-point way to articulate that video.

Because, if we're being truthful, without that video coming forward, we wouldn't be here. And, of course, that is what is most troubling about it all.

Just stop killing us. Stop Killing us.

Recently Read Posts

Sunday Sundown Rundown - 5/22/22

3 Up 1. NY Times Investigative Series on Haiti - The history of Haiti is such a complex (and unfortunate) one. Really, it's a story that goes untold, specifically for the context of how the country is viewed. From being forced to pay operations to enslavers (yeah, you read that right), to so many other historical setbacks - including American interventions - the nation's history is so well laid out in this latest NY Times piece. I urge you to give it a read.  2. Equal Pay for US Women's Soccer Team - Kudos to US Soccer on coming around to giving the USWNT their due - equal pay for prize money from the World Cup. It's a start, and more importantly, it's a push forward for women's sports that do in fact push the needle in comparison, or more so, to their male counterparts.  3. Kate McKinnon - Random "UP" here, but I'm doing it anyway...A few SNL usuals are rumored to be walking away, including Kate McKinnon. The show obviously doesn't carry the

Sunday Sundown Rundown - 4/10/22

3 Up 1. Ketanji Brown Jackson - The new Supreme Court Justice is a win for black and brown girls everywhere. Representation matters.  2. Women's College Basketball Ratings - I'm giving the women's tournament its due as it garnered the highest television ratings ever for the national championship game in eighteen years. And that was head-to-head with the Grammys! Spare me the "women's sports don't draw" tired narrative. Invest in women's sports, period.  3. Baseball Returns - Sure, the sport bothered fans over the winter with its ugly and insulting labor spat. However, it's back, and that's cool.  3 Down 1. Ukraine Images - Unfortunately, I had to put the ongoing acts in Ukraine back in the tops spot. Have you seen some of the images coming out of the country? For me, it was the image of parents writing children's information (i.e. names, details of eating habits, etc...) on their backs - on their backs! - in anticipation of being separated

Sunday Sundown Rundown - 5/15/22

3 Up 1. California Church Heroes - It's soooooooo weird that the top spot is a result of something so horrific as our ongoing domestic terrorism problem of mass shootings. Still, the courage shown by the five members who stopped the shooter deserves it. Those individuals tackled the shooter and tied him up with an electric cord, while wounded.  It's so tough to fathom that those possibilities are within the realm of your Sunday worship, within the sanctity of your church.  But such is America... 2. Olivia Rodrigo & Drake - Rodrigo continues to reap rewards on an excellent album in 2021 as she topped the Billboard Music Awards with seven awards. There was also Drake who I'm beginning to sense we won't really appreciate his body of work until he's near the end of his career. But yeah, Drake poured in a few more for the legacy debates and discussions.

Sunday Sundown Rundown - 5/1/22

3 Up 1. Harvard Statement on Enslavement Past - We're currently in a world where dealing with slavery and oppression and all that it was in the past has created further division of the present, as well as ideals to move forward. We're all still trying to figure that out, but as we do, props are given to those who do it without the trendiness of the gesture.  Harvard can be slammed for a whole lot in this arena, but they get the top spot this week for taking steps in a major way - just admitting its connection - is a great start.  2. "Out of Pandemic" Phase - The world surely feels as "normal" as it's felt in a long time. While Dr. Facui's comments were well...confusing and required some cleaning up, the gesture is very much understood - we ain't that bad anymore! Things are definitely not going to snap back to pre-2020, but it definitely feels as close to non-pandemic-ish as it ever has.