Skip to main content

Sex Addiction: Real Diagnosis or Lame Excuse?

The issue of “Sex Addiction” is one that has become quite popular after the Tiger Woods saga. A topic that has been around for sometime now has become a forefront issue, and still has varying public opinions on the “addiction”.

In the past year, we have seen many public figures admit to being “Sex Addicts” in Tiger Woods and Steve Phillips, as well as shows dedicated to the topic such as Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew. Yet, despite the sudden boom in being a “sex addict”, there still lies many doubters over whether this is a serious addiction, or just another sham to explain our society's lack of responsibility and self-control. And for that reason, we’ll keep the title within quotes.

Today, ESPN.com featured a very interesting and powerful ten minute clip from their superb documentary series, Outside The Lines. The piece touches base on former basketball player and coach, Winston Bennett, and his struggles with “sex addiction”, and how it affected his life, and those that love him.

The aspect that really brings the situation out is Bennett’s ability to openly share his life. Most have used “sex addiction” as a reason to escape from infidelity and twist the situation into making themselves the victim.

While the notion of being addicted to whatever it may be, alcohol, drugs, or painkillers, are understandable, real, and scientifically supported by the body’s dependency for the addictive substance, “sex addiction” is described as being a compulsivity within the mind that triggers a person to act on their resting thoughts.

Maybe I am being a bit cynical, and slightly sarcastic, but if that were the case, couldn’t we slap “addict” after about anything a person does that they shouldn’t act upon?

“Jay-walking Addict”

or maybe thoughts that constantly consumes a person’s mind such as:

“Baseball Addict”

I often describe myself as a , “professional wrestling addict”, hey, maybe it is a real diagnosis. That’s my excuse, I just can’t help myself, I just need to see body slams, clotheslines and chair shots.

In all seriousness, whether being a “sex addict” is real or not, is yet to be determined. However, in a society where many of our mistakes, wrong doings, and transgressions are finding there way to being placed in the “It’s not your fault” pile, its no wonder the next generation is lacking responsibility and self control.

However with that said, Winston Bennett’s story is one - out of all the many that has been told - that has truly brought “sex addiction” to a real stature. One where a man lost everything, admitted it, has received help, and has created a support system to keep him accountable.

For the first time in hearing a story about someone being a “sex addict”, I didn’t roll my eyes or listen in cynicism.

And if this “addiction” is real and just that – an addiction – I shutter to think how many people out their in our “sex sells” society that are not in the public eye are suffering from this.

Recently Read

Quick Ponder: Future Self

We always think,  what would we say  to our  younger self? However,  what would  our younger self say  if they met us, today?

Knicks Trauma - Ugh Not Again

Well, that was a kick in the stomach.  Coming off a week where the word "catharsis" was used as the description for the euphoria and release of joy from two and a half decades of suffering, Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals against the Indiana Pacers brought about another word - trauma.  Watching the Knicks collapse was the kind of moments that come with these deep runs and moments. NBA Playoff basketball will do that. Yet, this loss - this one - feels about as bad as the 2004 ALCS when the Yankees collapsed in the series to the Boston Red Sox.  That one carries some serious trauma. Luckily, the series isn't over.  Some other quick thoughts from this awful, awful night, New York Knicks Basketball.  - Not to conjure up hyperbole, or even contribute to "hot take" sports reaction culture - but this might have been the worst loss in Knicks franchise history. I cannot think of another in my lifetime, or historically.  - Tyrese Haliburton's "choke"...

Knicks Back in ECF Causing Catharsis

I've certainly shared my emotions and thoughts regarding the New York Knicks on this site over the years. There have been plenty of those to sort through - most of them are rants. Tonight, the New York Knicks ultimately destroyed the Boston Celtics in Game 6 of the Eastern Conference Semi-Finals, 119-81. I sat on my couch, afraid to allow myself to feel joy until that final buzzer. As a Knicks fan, I've been through too much to allow myself to do anything else, to make any assumption, until it was final. Until it was confirmed. Until something couldn't fall through...the way we're used to.  Once it was final, it was unreal.  The New York Knicks are in the Eastern Conference Finals. For the first time since 2000.  I was 15 years old the last time that happened. And that was a run with a squad that I consider (still) to be my favorite Knicks team of all-time.  I sat on my couch with all sorts of feelings. My wife was likely trying to understand the moment. My son, exci...