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The Unity Road Writings - Lose Yourself

Plus 365 days. 

Thought this road was over, huh?

Well, honestly, so did I.

But the one thing I've learned as the tag team partner and I celebrate one year of marriage bliss is that this "Unity Road" has merely just begun. 

And with one year under our belts, I think I can speak for the both of us and say that it hasn't been as much of a drastic change as most people warn or continually push. I'm not sure if it is because we are so compatible, if we are more ready for this step than others were, if our personalities make it easier, or if we're some freak duo that defy the usual marriage hardships. For the most part, year one of marriage, has been special, but really is more reflective of seven years of being together. 

However, personally speaking, there are things that are hard about marriage. Things that I really feel no one would understand until they are sharing a last name with the love of their life. There are many aspects that as a husband, I can get better at, and become more effective and habitual in doing.

For example, besides this little blog called Dome Pondering, I have a tough time in admitting that a situation maybe bigger than I am. I tend to keep a poker face through these moments, or at least try to. It's not a tough guy or macho issue revolving around my ego by any means. However, it's simply me always believing that there is no point in complaining. One of my pet peeves are people that choose to complain about the situation rather than deal with the issue at hand. With that being said, simply opening up and letting the tag team partner in on these moments or situations is a challenge. 

Honestly, there are many ways in which I can improve on sharing my life. The biggest challenge that has shown itself in year one of marriage is the blending of both of your lives and truly living transparent with one another. 

We all have those moments where we like time to be alone, and keep our troubles to ourselves. Maybe even try to figure them out in our head. Or heck, maybe that is just me. 

But the trivial blending of things such as living style, different ways of doing things, or attacking different issues pales in comparison to the issue of truly becoming one life.

When you're dating, you are together, but there are still aspects of your life that are still yours. As marriage continues to cement itself in my life, the issue of "your" life really begins to fade away. Letting go of that, or simply learning that notion, is essential to your marriage's health for the future. 

It's essential to becoming a better husband. And essential to becoming a better leader in my household. 

At this stage, I'm still learning, I'm still living, I'm still loving, and now, I'm losing - my life - and appreciating the fact that we are building, our life.

So far after one year, it hasn't been that hard, but it hasn't been easy. But nothing worth anything ever is. 

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