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The Pondering 10 - Qualities Men Really Want

I have a friend who is single, and has many rules about what is ideal woman should bring to the table of any potential relationship. The rules are complex and lengthy, and quite honestly aren't wrong or correct in anyway - they are his rules. I also have a friend who feels the same way, and wants many things from her potential significant other. She also claims, "men are too complex." We all have different things we desire, and that's without the comprehensive barrier that is between men and women.

We all know and have seen (especially guys) the articles in women-geared content that help the female side in their journey through a relationship. "Things that will keep him happy!" "What Does He Want!" "Be His Perfect Woman!" You know exactly the headlines and articles I am talking about. And often, even the professionals make it way too complicated, adding psychology and other things that make things between the sexes that more confusing. As a simple guy, I'll take a shot at this, and state ten things - ten simple things - men want in their women. Just an honest, raw, and rare edition of the Pondering 10.


10. Rollin' Up The Sleeves - Now we don't expect women to change the brakes on the car or repair a broken AC unit (bonus points if they can), however, a woman that works hard and is not afraid to roll up her sleeves and get the task done when it comes to the messy ones, is always admirable. No self-respecting, hard-working man wants a trophy wife to sit around all day doing nothing. 


9. Interest in Our Sports Teams - On a range of not at at all, to maybe just a little bit, we know you don't really care. If you do, that is awesome! However, if you don't we just ask that you throw us a bone and simply pretend to care. This includes respecting the codes, which you might think are silly, in which we dictate our sports-eccentric lives. So yes, when we say you must be in the same position when the team of our - yes, our - household is doing well, we mean it. And yes, there are moments in a game where small talk is inexcusable. If you can do that, we'd really, really dig you. And for the record, you wearing our favorite team's t-shirt or jersey is very attractive. It's sadly true.


8. Different Stuff, Different Day - Don't be boring! It's bad enough that adulthood and relationships require work and energy, and if you're married, the day-to-day operation of your household, but to contribute to the mundane, cyclical life by be boring is a deal breaker. We want a woman that is interested in different things than we are, that would bring things into our lives, and have the ability to make everyday feel special. Ca-ching! Put that on a Hallmark card!


7. Stomach is the Easiest Way... - Cooking is a bonus. A huge bonus! If you are lucky enough to land a woman that can cook, you landed the rare one, kind of like a fully loaded car. If not, we ask that you at least try. Learn, maybe? Bake, maybe? At least do what you can, rather than simply give yourself to the beast that is nightly takeout food. Cooking is not a derogatory concept that handcuffs women into ancient philosophies. It's another way to say I love you, and a good way to remind us that you do care.

Heck, honestly, there is no better way to get our attention! If you cook for the average man, he is all ears during that meal.


6. Don't Emasculate Us - Now there are times our egos run wild and we need you to pop the balloon to bring us back to reality. We do need that!. More on that later.

However, sometimes we just need to feel like a man. Just like we don't pick out curtains, throw pillows and/or wall frames because its your thing and it is important to you, we also need our time to fill that burning desire to be, well...the man! So don't dress us down in public for failing at something or remind us that we can't do something. Everyone man wants a woman that can build us up. We need it.


5. Express Yo Self - This continues to be a sticking point between men and women. But every man wants a woman that simply tells us what they want. No tricks. No signs. No hinting or inferring. Express your decisions, and make them known. It'll make things much easier, and save the headaches and arguments.


4. Intimacy - Need I explain? What guy is opposed to this?


3. Caring - A woman with a sense of nurture and unselfishness is always desirable. Someone that brings us a drink when we are working, or a bowl of soup when we are sick, or even a cold beer during the game, you know, the one you should pretend to be interested in.


2. Checks, Balances, and Challenges - Pushovers make for the worst relationships. No one likes someone that agrees with them constantly. I'm not saying all men are looking for that crazy woman that is super demanding either, but having someone that challenges us in all facets of life is important to the growth of not just us men, but both parties in the relationship. It keeps us grounded, and also allows us to dream big. A good woman knows the fine lines on how to do both.


1. Stand By Your Maaaaaaan! - Ultimately, every man wants a woman that is loyal, and will support him at all times. That's pretty much it - clear, cut, and dry. Once you have this, many of the others begin to fall into place. 

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