So I finally did it. I finally wrote the note that only took me several months to do. For those of you who have no idea what I am referring to, I refer you to I am My Brother's Keeper (Part I). After months of either weighing what I was going to write or simply delaying the actual writing of the letter because of a slight nervousness amd fear of rejection, today, yours truly pulled a Nike. I just did it. While flipping between watching a Knicks Summer-league game and New York Red Bulls game, I suddenly and simply felt the urge to finally get this done.
The tag team partner who suddenly saw me put pen to paper, reacted justly to the whimsical and random nature of my decision, "Ok, well alright! You're crazy."
And maybe I am crazy. I wouldn't necessarily deny that claim outright.
However, it quite possibly could have been a subconscious effort after watch Chris Smith, brother of New York Knicks shooting guard, J.R. Smith, and the broadcasters chatting about them possibly being the first brother combination to play on the same team in the NBA if Chris made the team.
Or maybe because I got off the phone with my mother a few minutes earlier.
Or quite possibly because I had just finished wrapping up the latest Pondering 10, Things I Miss as a Kid.
Maybe it was all of the above.
Whatever it was, I got it done.
As per my worries in what I should write, I simply decided to keep it short, filled with small talk, and of course, provide the hook of leaving the ball in his court. E-mail information was given as well as my parents current phone number if he is interested in making a reply.
If there is a reply, then we can move forward in rebuilding a relationship, and hopefully finding out one day why things played out the way they did.
If not, then, I did exactly what my heart told me to do, and what my conscience urged me to get done. I can now cross this off a list of "what if's" in my life.
Whether there is a Part III to this saga completely depends on his reply - if any at all.
Either way, as I said in Part I, I broke the silence and made the first move.
In this race called life, sometimes, putting yourself out there is all you can do.